Non Gay Republicans Urge Craig To Flush
Several of the members of the "Non- Homosexual Republican Caucus" have urged Idaho senator Larry Craig and "Mr. Potato Head of 1961", as he is known among fellow gay fancy shoe movement Republicans to resign from the senate and skip all the way downtown to the nearest pay toilet to show other gay republicans how to win friends and influence people with nice shoes and what you can do with them.
After his arrest several months ago for rubbing his shoes against those of an undercover shoe policeman in an unofficial gay pay toilet, and pleading guilty in court to disorderly conduct, Senator Craig ( or "Boise" as he is known back home in Idaho where the homosexuals approve of gay shoe sex and pay toiletry) now says he is not now and has never been gay, and pulled his wife out of his ass to prove that he is totally heterosexual and a family man.
After Washington police hosed the shit off of Mrs. Craig, she repeated word for word what her husband had said, and added that he fucks her on a regular basis, but was "concerned" about him wearing his wingtips to bed.
Also Mrs. Craig said that her straight husband was a monster in bed, and she pulled up her dress to show the bruises from his shoes to prove it. "My husband is a total babe, and likes girls and not boys and I have had babies from this man.
The GSA (Gay Shoe Administration) in the meantime has said that Craig has not applied for membership with the group, but said, that from newspaper accounts and blogs, like this one, he has the moves of an old hand at making the moves with his shoes.
Back in Washington, Senator Craig, who has been described as "anti-gay" but not "anti-toilet homosexual" was not available for further comment.
His wife said that today is the day he gets his spit shine.
More on this happening story as Senator Craig gets gayer and gayer.
Joe
After his arrest several months ago for rubbing his shoes against those of an undercover shoe policeman in an unofficial gay pay toilet, and pleading guilty in court to disorderly conduct, Senator Craig ( or "Boise" as he is known back home in Idaho where the homosexuals approve of gay shoe sex and pay toiletry) now says he is not now and has never been gay, and pulled his wife out of his ass to prove that he is totally heterosexual and a family man.
After Washington police hosed the shit off of Mrs. Craig, she repeated word for word what her husband had said, and added that he fucks her on a regular basis, but was "concerned" about him wearing his wingtips to bed.
Also Mrs. Craig said that her straight husband was a monster in bed, and she pulled up her dress to show the bruises from his shoes to prove it. "My husband is a total babe, and likes girls and not boys and I have had babies from this man.
The GSA (Gay Shoe Administration) in the meantime has said that Craig has not applied for membership with the group, but said, that from newspaper accounts and blogs, like this one, he has the moves of an old hand at making the moves with his shoes.
Back in Washington, Senator Craig, who has been described as "anti-gay" but not "anti-toilet homosexual" was not available for further comment.
His wife said that today is the day he gets his spit shine.
More on this happening story as Senator Craig gets gayer and gayer.
Joe
posted by Mr. Liberty at 5:30 PM
2 Comments:
I don't know, Joe, it's all kind of sad for me, an old Nixon-Republican (minus the jowels).
Why can't they have good old fashioned manly scandals - like Money Stuffed In Freezers and Illegal Wiretaps?
Instead they seem to do the shoe thing and go after small boys and sheep.
~phil
Phil, we have yet to hear from the Sheep Caucus, but I would think that their opinion counts here.
Sadly, I have heard (here, in this sentence) that Craig inherited Nixon's shoe's.
The "Boys From Boise" young men's organization has remained silent in the face (shoes?) of these sad events.
Oh, the ignominy! (Or goody two shoes!?)
joe
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